Friday, March 6, 2009

Dialectical Contradictions


One of my favorite political humor sites is The People's Cube - a humorous satire that points out all the various levels of socialism inherent in the liberal/Democrat/Progressive platform by comparing them to the old Soviet Union regime's propaganda and imagery.

While most of the articles and blog entries are satirical in nature, there was actually a serious-toned article written by one of their contributors from a Russian immigrant to America who discussed the dialectical contradictions of the Soviet Communist Regime...and how he came to America and sees the same sort of dialectical contradictions here. From the article

Contradictions of Socialism (I saw the future & ran away)

There was a time in recent American history when certain Soviet jokes didn't work in translation - not so much because of the language differences, but because of the lack of common sociopolitical context. But that is changing. As President Obama is preparing us for a great leap towards collectivism, I find myself recollecting forgotten political jokes I shared with comrades while living in the old country under Brezhnev, Andropov, and Gorbachev. (I was too young to remember the Khrushchev times, but I remember the Khrushchev jokes.) I also noticed that the further America "advances" back to the Soviet model, the more translatable the old Soviet jokes become. ~

Not all Soviet advancements have metastasized here yet, but we have four more glorious years to make it happen.


Here is the old joke that he recalled from his life in the old Soviet Empire:

The six dialectical contradictions of socialism in the USSR:

  • There is full employment - yet no one is working.
  • No one is working - yet the factory quotas are fulfilled.
  • The factory quotas are fulfilled - yet the stores have nothing to sell.
  • The stores have nothing to sell - yet people got all the stuff at home.
  • People got all the stuff at home - yet everyone is complaining.
  • Everyone is complaining - yet the voting is always unanimous.

Here's his explanation of dialectical contributions...which is what we NWO conspiracy theorists with tin foil hats firmly planted on our heads recognize as the Hegelian Dialectic...the old "thesis + antithesis = synthesis"

Dialectical contradictions are one of the pillars in Marxist philosophy, which states that contradictions eventually lead to a unity of opposites as the result of a struggle. This gave a convenient "scientific" excuse for the existence of contradictions in a socialist society, where opposites were nice and agreeable - unlike the wild and crazy opposites of capitalism that could never be reconciled. Hence the joke.

Except it's really not that funny when you really think about it. Especially when you consider his recognition of the dialectical contradictions he sees in America that parallel his observations of life in the USSR...

When I moved to America, where wild and crazy opposites of capitalism were supposedly at their worst. Until recently, however, the only contradictions that struck me as irreconcilable were these:

Economic justice:

  • America is capitalist and greedy - yet half of the population is subsidized.
  • Half of the population is subsidized - yet they think they are victims.
  • They think they are victims - yet their representatives run the government.
  • Their representatives run the government - yet the poor keep getting poorer.
  • The poor keep getting poorer - yet they have things that people in other countries only dream about.
  • They have things that people in other countries only dream about - yet they want America to be more like those other countries.

Hollywood cliches:

  • Without capitalism there'd be no Hollywood - yet filmmakers hate capitalism.
  • Filmmakers hate capitalism - yet they sue for unauthorized copying of their movies.
  • They sue for unauthorized copying - yet on screen they teach us to share.
  • On screen they teach us to share - yet they keep their millions to themselves.
  • They keep their millions to themselves - yet they revel in stories of American misery and depravity.
  • They revel in stories of American misery and depravity - yet they blame the resulting anti-American sentiment on conservatism.
  • They blame the anti-American sentiment on conservatism - yet conservatism ensures the continuation of a system that makes Hollywood possible.

I never thought I would see socialist contradictions in America, let alone write about them. But somehow all attempts to organize life according to "progressive" principles always result in such contradictions. And in the areas where "progressives" have assumed positions of leadership - education, news media, or the entertainment industry - contradictions become "historically inevitable."

If one were accidentally to open his eyes and compare the "progressive" narrative with facts on the ground, one might start asking questions.

Indeed.

Here are a few more select dialectical contradictions he lists --

People's power:

  • Liberals believe they're advancing people's power - yet they don't believe people can do anything right without their guidance.
  • People can't do anything right - yet the government bureaucracy can do everything.
  • The government bureaucracy can do everything - yet liberals don't like it when the government takes control of their lives.
  • Liberals don't like it when the government takes control of their lives - yet they vote for programs that increase people's dependency on the government.
  • They vote for programs that increase people's dependency on the government - yet they believe they're advancing people's power.
Public education:
  • Liberals have been in charge of education for 50 years - yet education is out of control.
  • Education is out of control - yet liberal teaching methods prevail.
  • Liberal teaching methods prevail - yet public schools are failing.
  • Public schools are failing - yet their funding keeps growing.
  • Their funding keeps growing - yet public schools are always underfunded.
  • Public schools are always underfunded - yet private schools yield better results for less.
  • Private schools yield better results for less - yet public education is the only way out of the crisis.
Liberals and taxes:
  • Liberals want to help the poor - yet they won't give money to charities.
  • They won't give money to charities - yet they'd like the government to become a gigantic charity.
  • They'd like the government to become a gigantic charity - yet the money has to be taken from people by force.
  • The money has to be taken from people by force - yet they call it welfare.
  • They call it welfare - yet higher taxes make everyone poorer.
  • Higher taxes make everyone poorer - yet liberals find ways not to pay taxes.
  • Liberals find ways not to pay taxes - yet they get to be chosen to run the government.
Love and marriage:
  • Sex differences are the result of social conditioning - yet homosexuality is biological.
  • Homosexuality is biological - yet everybody is encouraged to experiment with it.
  • Everybody is encouraged to experiment with it - yet venereal diseases are treated at the taxpayers' expense.
  • Venereal diseases are treated at the taxpayers' expense - yet taxpayers have no right to impose standards since there are no moral absolutes.
  • There are no moral absolutes - yet gay marriage is an absolute must.
  • Gay marriage is an absolute must - yet family is an antiquated tool of bourgeois oppression.

The one criticisim I have of RedSquare is that it is a GOP-sympathizing website...pro-Bush, pro-War, pro-Compassionate conservative. While I love a good skewering of the Feminazi's and the sympathizing, emasculated manginas that make up the Demo-lib-progessive party, the failure to note the dialectical contradictions of the Republicans is a huge ideological blind spot for Red Square...they are unaware that they are playing their own role in implementing the Hegelian Dialectic of Republican + Democrat = NWO.

But they're still funny as hell!

Some MRA related dialectical contradictions:

Can you think of anymore?

12 comments:

Davout said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Davout said...

1. The father has zero rights during the pregnancy. Yet, after childbirth, the father is magically given the right to be financially responsible for the child for 18 years.

2. Rape is about 'power', not sex. Yet rapists almost exclusively target young, hot women most able to defend themselves rather than older women much less able to defend themselves.

3. Men should not be intimidated by strong, independent women. Yet female-dominated relationships exhibit the highest incidence of female-on-male domestic violence, relative to all other relationships.

Anonymous said...

I hate the way Marxists have stolen the word Liberal. I support the Liberal ideas of small government, individual liberty and free capitalism. (not the crony capitalism we live under)
I despise how Marxists have hijacked the word Liberalism and are using it as a cover to bring in there Soviet Style police state.

mandy said...

* Women should be able to hold any position of power, such as president - but they don't have to fight on the front lines and can't be drafter

*Mothers should be independent of men - via welfare (most paid by mens' taxes)

*Marriage is slavery for women - yet men are cruelly withholding such commitments.

*Women and men are exactly the same except for their genitalia, they are completely interchangeable, and totally equal in every regard and capability- yet men are uniquely cruel by nature of being men and have dominated women for eons.(replace with women/men with blacks/whites and it still works)


*Men are ageist for preferring younger women - yet women spend tons of money on plastic surgery, skin treatments, hair dye, make up trying to look younger in order to appeal to men.

*Men have held women back from reaching their full potential - yet with all womens' new found power and opportunity, men still invent more, design more and generally advance society with what power, energy and time they have.

*Dual incomes are now necessary to raise a middle class family thanks to decreased salaries from double the labor force - yet the government should pay for strangers to raise people's kids aka day care(once done for "free" by mothers)

Hawaiian Libertarian said...

Davout & Mandy - thanks for the excellent contributions!

Hawaiian Libertarian said...

I like this one best:

"*Marriage is slavery for women - yet men are cruelly withholding such commitments."

Reminds of The Eternal Bachelor's old byline:

"Give Western Women the husband they deserve. None."

lol

Rob Fedders said...

This article is full of them.

"Amid claims they want financial independence, feminists push legislation adding ex-husbands' pensions to the divorce loot. They insist PMS doesn't disqualify women from strategic offices and that it so addles their brains it excuses murder. They claim women and stronger and smarter than men, who easily beat and rape them, and that they need separate schools to avoid masculine competition. The list is endless."

Davout said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Elusive Wapiti said...

Late comer to this post, HL. I laughed my butt off. Good stuff!

How bout these (closely related) two:

Women are supposedly the more relational sex, yet is is women who withhold sex when in a relationship

Women are supposedly the more relational sex, yet it is women who dissolve the majority of committed relationships

Hawaiian Libertarian said...

Good ones EW - but these are "contradictions" so you don't need to put "supposedly" in there - that's already implied! :)

Women are the more relational sex, yet is is women who withhold sex when in a relationship.

Women are the more relational sex, yet it is women who dissolve the majority of committed relationships.

Sweating Through fog said...

Thanks for this - pretty funny, and true.

Brian Dean said...

Here are some from Rush Limbaugh

http://www.rushlimbaugh.com/home/daily/site_032609/content/01125108.guest.html

Obama is so smart that he can increase the national debt by $9 trillion and brag that he's cutting spending by $4 trillion!

Obama's so smart, he can say he wants us out of Iraq in 16 months and he can say that for the next 27 months.