Namely, I believe that we men who have knowledge of just how destructive feminism has been to families, children and society-at-large, have two rational choices to make in this day and age.
1) Avoid marriage or cohabitation...in terms of MRA - MGTOW;
or 2) Find a woman who is worthy of trust and understands how much power she has when a man marries and has children with her -- and won't abuse it for selfish reasons that result in broken homes and another generation of children scarred by the psychic damage from being raised without a constant, positive Father influence in their lives.
While I certainly understand, sympathize and support MGTOW...the logical conclusion to the MGTOW movement if it were to become as widespread as feminism has, is the SAME biological/evolutionary dead end as feminist cat ladies. It's surrendering the next generation to the marxo-femi-socialists agenda.
I think MGTOW is a perfectly acceptable response to the ubiquitous pervasiveness of the corruption of feminism...I do tend to notice that the most outspoken and eloquent MGTOW MRA's appear to be from the UK -- where feminism has taken root much more strongly and affected far more areas of everyone's lives. Yet, I think more men need to find a woman worthy of exercising option 2 if we are to ever have hope of reversing the mainstream status of the femi-centric mentality we currently live with.
New Zealand anti-feminist blogger, Julie, from Balance the Genders, recently made a comment on Rob Fedder's No Ma'am blog that helped me come to this realization:
Many of us blogging are not "Old School." We were not the ones seeing this coming. We are the ones living in, "What came."
Today is a different day. We are not seeing into the future and trying to open the eyes of "What will be" into males and females.
We are in it. We are the future meaning today is a different day.
This is absolutely correct...yet I never thought about it in this "frame of perception" until I read this. Great insight Julie.
I love this site and others that work out, "What happened" because the past holds our answer to the future. But because we are the future, we can't be the past. (Does that even make sense)
The old school feminists were so busy taking control at the top, they forgot to take control of the bottom being the people growing up. Now they realise where they failed they are educating the next generation.
This is so true. The hope lies in the fact that the truth is out there. We, as MRAs, have the advantage of pointing to the ill effects of what the feminsts have wrought as the effective means of educating the next generation on just why marriage and creating stable, nuclear families is so important.
But while they forgot the people the MRA did not. They did not have the power so they concentrated on our generation.
That means this day, being us, is their turn.
But right now, for those of us that know better, is the time for us to take OUR TURN.
This is balance and this is normal in history. It is up to us to balance what the last generation went 'Cuckoo' on.
How do we do it?
Well, we go back to basics. The "old school" MRA tell us we have no hope in affecting the media because they had no hope. But then they had no hope because in their day, the feminists had severe control over this. But today, the journalists are our age and the media and just as us they want truth. Just like us they have passion and they do what they love to do.
I personally too have heard all the "Can't do" but I questioned it and reached out to Human Rights Commission, Education Departments, Women's groups and so on only to get thanked for my input. These poeple see, really see and really want to change things. This is their passion.
Please don't give up on our generation. I am not hopeless,. you are not hopeless and neither is the most of us. This is our day.
You're right Julie. We must never surrender...because surrendering to the feminist agenda is to not lose society for ourselves..but to lose it for the next generation.
So...regarding the next generation - I found another source of inspiration from Outcast Superstar's blog, in which he cited a post from the "Don't Get Married" forum. The author of this post makes some GREAT points on how we should be training the next generation of Men to carefully choose a woman worthy of creating the next generation of anti-feminists:
So, no matter how insane it is to marry with current Ameriskanks and the legal system, men will marry.If you are one of them who must marry, at least try to be as intelligent about it as you can.First, examine the woman as best as you can. Let me repeat good signs and bad signs involving a particular woman.1. Don't marry a divorced woman.
The dog that has bit will bite again. Divorced women have a higher divorce rate then first marriage.2. Don't marry an unwed mother.
There are two types of unwed mothers. One is pure skank, and is an unwed mother because she skanked out. The other type, rather rare in the US, but relatively common in Mexico, simply made a stupid mistake, and trusted a Bad Man. The rare type is marriageable, but it is really tricky to sort them out with a high probability of error, so don't bother. Generally, though, unwed mothers are also more likely to be divorced.3. Don't marry the daughter of a divorced woman.
Not only is she probably accustomed to the state of being divorced because of her mother's divorce state, but really does not know how to be married. They also have a higher than normal divorce rate.4. Don't marry the daughter of an unwed mother.
They are also not accustomed to being around married people, so have a higher divorce rate than average.5. Look for a woman who has ever done anything for anyone.
Most US women never have. "It's all about me." and they aren't kidding. They will tell you at great length what you are supposed to do for them, but they have no intention of ever doing anything for you. Run!6. Look for a woman who shows signs of respecting external authority. There are only two systems of morality. Either internal morality, which means "if it feels good do it" or external, which usually means a religious based morality.
I do NOT mean a person who claims to be religious, because Christian women have a higher divorce rate than non-Christian women. You have to observe her, with the care one should use when selecting the woman to trust his life and all his assets with. Look for any signs of real morality, of following basic rules such as the Ten Commandments.There is a Catch-22 problem here. If she agrees to shack-up with you, she is bending her morality, and that is by definition a bad sign. I can't tell you how to resolve this Catch-22 conflict.7. Credit Card check.
If she had thousands of dollars of credit card debt, she is bad news. If she has a lot of debt, she should also flunk other stuff, but it is possible you are enamored of her mighty chest and might be foolish enough to overlook other tests, but a woman with a lot of debt will not only expect you to pay it off once but all the time. She is materialistic and greedy and way into instant gratification. Run!8. The driving Test.
This is a one-way valve. If the woman drives like a fiend, running red lights; driving way over the posted speed limit; generally ignoring the laws of physics, ask no further question, dump her ASAP and move on. Women who drive like that almost always get divorced. They recognize no external morality. They have no concern for the well-being of others. They will do exactly whatever they feel like, whenever they feel like it.I am told by someone else on this URL that it is possible for a woman to drive carefully, and still be a total junkyard. So, the driving test is a one-way valve. If she flunks, get rid of her. If she doesn't flunk, make sure she passes the other tests.9. Women perform in marriage based on their relationship with their fathers.
From their fathers, they learn how to understand men and to enjoy being around them, without expecting them to think and act like women. If she passes the other tests, and also is very, very close to her father, your chances of divorce because of her skank-ness are very low.10. If she expects a diamond costing three or four months pay, thank her profusely for exposing her skankness, and give her the boot.
Ditto for an expensive wedding. In the 80's a divorce attorney wrote a book documenting the inverse relationship between cost of wedding and length of marriage. The more it cost, the quicker the divorce.
These 10 points are EXACTLY what we need to teach the next generation of men about choosing a woman who is most likely to be "the one" to nurture a marriage and a family and ensure a reasonable chance of success in raising a generation prepared to deal with a society that has been decimated by the feminist revolution we currently live in.
Now on to the final test (there is only one for men to use for themselves):
1. Is hunting or fishing or riding your motorcycle or playing video games more important to you than your wife will be?
If so, break the engagement, it's not worth it. Don't even think of marrying someone if your hobbies are more important to you. When you marry, your wife is the most important thing to you. Not because she is a demanding skank, but because that's the way marriage is.
As important as it is to choose the right woman, if you are not willing to at least "ease up" on your hobbies to a certain degree, you should definitely become another member of MGTOW.
Now, after all this, if you still decide you have found a woman who is worth the risks posed by the Divorce industry culture that gives her all of the power to wreck the family, you must apply yourself to making your marriage work. Just because she has most of the power to destroy your marriage and family does not mean you don't have any power yourself in sabotaging your own family...
As this poster Outcast quotes points out, what men need to do once they do get married, is to TAKE CONTROL.
Since it is not easy to explain what is meant by taking charge, and all sorts of weird men have all sorts of mentally unhealthy views of taking charge, let me start by explaining first what I don't mean.
I don't mean a pistol, a chair, and a whip, ala lion tamer.
Maybe 20 years ago, I knew a young Mexican woman married to a much older male skank. Every time we met them, he made a point to tell her if she ever misbehaved, he'd send her back to poverty. What a S O B! She didn't need to hear it more than once. And, when he said it, she looked sick. If I ever encountered her with a steak knife rammed into his chest and it was hung up on gristle, I'd have helped her push it. Marriage based on fear is not marriage.
The very foundation of success of the feminist effort to become the mainstream mentality was to attack the very basis of Patriarchy - by telling woman that having a man "take control" is "oppressive" by conflating relational control with Mental or Physical abuse. Mental and physical abuse are just as destructive as the feminist paradigm of selfishness...and is NOT what "relational control" means.
When I was a boy, my mother told me, "Son, when you are married, and your wife is in a bad mood, buy her flowers and take her out to eat." Good job, Mom-skank, thanks for destroying my first marriage with your fucked up fantasies, you fiend!
And right there is the crux of all the problems manifest in children raised by single mothers in today's Matriarchal mentality. Raising their sons to believe they need to cater to women's emotional fluctuations while raising daughters to believe that what they want and need (a man to protect and provide for her and her family with competent leadership) and what they think they want (a man that caters to her emotional state) are two totally different things that create cognitive dissonance and results in the crazy behavior so many modern women are prone to in this day and age of Matriarchal chaos.
I can tell you, though, that is what most men do. As long as Cupcake is in a good mood, they run around doing all their hobbies and having a great time, with little attention paid to their wives. Until she gets on her ear, then they panic this way and that, doing all sorts of things to make her feel all better.I call this, "Giving your dog a bone when he bites you." You have an operant conditioning program, teaching your wife the way to get warm fuzzies is to be a bitch.
As in most cases, men should normally be doing exactly the opposite of what they are told to do. Treat your wife like a queen, then when she's a bitch, stop all the warm fuzzies, and she will grovel to get them back.
I've been married for 10 years this June (one reason why I'm not a MGTOW blogger - I couldn't. I've been married before I was even consciously aware of the current state of our feminist warped society. Luckily, without consciously realizing it, I chose a woman who passes 9 of the 10 points of the tests listed above - which is why I believe we will be making 10 years soon.)
However, it has only been through recent readings of a plethora of MRA sights, as well as perusing through the pages of another blog I found quite informative and helpful - the Reality Method and a few columns from Ross In Range - that I've finally come to realize that I too had been catering to my wife's emotional state. But in the last few months, I've begun to apply what I've learned from all this reading, and I must say, my marriage is at the best state it's ever been...even better than our "honeymoon" period! To repeat the basic point: Treat your wife like a queen, then when she's a bitch, stop all the warm fuzzies, and she will grovel to get them back. From my own anectdotal experience, I found this principle to be 100% correct!!!!
So, when she is in a good mood, go for walks hand in hand. Buy her flowers and tell her when you saw those flowers, you felt sorry for them because they were going to die without seeing true beauty, so you decided to let them see her.
Rub her feet! At least three or four times a week. When you are doing this, it's as hard for her to be angry with you as it is hard for you to be angry while she's shoveling your ashes. There are two kinds of women. Some women only want their skin rubbed. My Real Daughter lies there moaning and gasping with delight when I rub her feet, and it is just a very soft rubbing of the skin. My Biological Daughter likes her feet and legs kneaded like making yeast bread with all your strength. Few women don't like foot rubs. And, it does soften them up for other fun activities!
Yep. This too works most of the time.
Do things with her, in some cases whatever she likes to do, except shopping; that is asking too much unless you get to sit by the door and watch girls walking by. Go to the spring flower show at the municipal parks. Take her for long drives to see the autumn colors. Walk at night and look at the stars.
Yes, these type of activities offer "experiences" that are much more memorable than going out and spending money on the same old restaurants and movie theatres.
Take her to chick flicks. Rent her choice of DVD's at least half the time.
Now here is where I take exception. Chick flicks are for chicks. That's what she has girlfriend's for.
One thing more. Most of what I know about men and women and marriage, I learned from counseling men. This is one I blundered on by myself. The first fifteen years of my marriage weren't too hot, except for the kids. I don't remember how I figured this out.
And this is where MRA blogs are VITAL to the effort of rearing the next generation of anti-feminists!
The next point is also crucial to marital success:
But, you want to control your wife's association with you.
Think about men you know. Joe's always happy. "Hey, buddy, how's your hammer hangin'? Let's have a beer!" You can't think of Joe in any other way.Bill is a grouch. Always whining about something. Never fixes anything. Just likes to whine. And, you can't think of Bill without thinking of his whining.Your wife will have a similar view of you, based on what she normally sees.
This is absolutely true. If you are a grouchy, miserable fuck, always complaining and grumbling, you are setting the tone for your relationship and how she percieves and reacts to you...EVEN IF YOU NEVER DIRECT THAT BEHAVIOR DIRECTLY AT HER. The poster elaborates:
When I was married 15 years, I started a campaign. When my wife came in the room, I said, "What a great wife! Mwaa, mwaa." Not smacking sounds, the words as spelled.
When I came in the room, I said, "What a great wife! Mwaa, mwaa."At first, she was angry. Then, she started laughing when I said it. Then, she began to take it as normal, which means my goal was reached. When she thought of me, she simply could not help but think of my face saying, "What a great wife! Mwaa, mwaa."December 29, 1995, I fell on my face in our Mexico City home, and was in a coma for 6 days. She was told I might be an idiot IF I survived. When I finally regained consciousness, I had tubes in my mouth and couldn't talk. I looked at her, and moved my lips, "Mwaa, mwaa." She started laughing and crying at the same time. She knew it was really me. (Turned out to be encephalitis)So, what is the purpose of this? It gives you control. Most men have nothing to do but suffer when their wives act like fiends. When you are doing all this stuff, and your wife is a jerk, and you cut off the warm fuzzies, she really starts to suffer and will do anything to get them back. You have something to take away from her when she's a jerk, and that's good.
This is where you get "Gender Balance." Because when it comes to common sense, everyone knows women control the major need we men have to be happy: sex. The only way to have success in a relationship, is to achieve balance by creating something she needs from you.
Most husbands don't have control; they don't have the wife addicted to warm fuzzies, so when a seducer at work gives them warm fuzzies, they think they have found their true love -- and you are toast.
This was how I was for the first 9 years of marriage, and we've had many, many ups and downs, conflicts and problems related to this. It was only through my raised awareness through reading MRAs and MGTOW that I finally learned about what I've been doing wrong all along. My children will be raised as anti-feminists, and they will have the positive examples of how a man and woman relate in a positive manner so they too can grow up and help propagate the next generation of AWARENESS.