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Saturday, December 14, 2019

The Oppression of Suppression




Commenter Mik left the following on my last post:

"Normally your blog address autocompletes or shows up in the first few results.

But this week you have been hidden to the 2nd page of search results with no autocomplete.

Gaagle censors hard at work..."

 Long time reader and most favored commenter of all time, Anonymous, concurred:

"Mik is correct, could not find your blog via google search for the same reason. Duckduckgo does result in your site at the top under "Hawaiian Libertarian", I was afraid this site got shoahed."

Ksmith chimed in:

"Yes! I too struggled to find your blog when I searched google."

My friends, the situation is much more dire than that. I'm at wits end and have nowhere else to turn, as I don't now how I'll be able to pull through my current predicament. The suppression of my virtual webpage rankings is pure oppression! But it's worse than that...much worse.

You see, not only has my Googliath rankings plummeted like a millstone around a pedos neck cast into the sea, but old pages from libtards and trollfarms on teh Interwebz that were dedicated to pillorying this squalid outpost in the fever swamps of conspiritard-land have also been pushed forward and highlighted as top ranking results on the first page of my Googliath search results.

All of a sudden on my stat counter page, I'm seeing sporadic visits from those old features on this blog, and I'm overcome with a crippling wave of nostalgia.

I miss all the attention I used to get when the mandrosphere was in it's heyday and I had a level of notoriety that invited critiques from internet luminaries found at bastions of towering intellects like Kiwi Farms. They are so important and influential, they got their own entries into teh Interwebz most prestigious encyclopedia.


Following that old linkage referrals, I found out to my surprise that back in 2016, this prestigious forum identified the proprietor of this blog as a Lolcow. What the hell is that?

"Lolcows are people and groups whose eccentric or foolish behavior can be "milked" for amusement and laughs."



Ya'all need to get it straight....I'm a whackaloon conspiritard that practices food magic. The Lolcow moniker will only work if it's a grass-fed, free-range, open-pastured Lolcow!

When I first followed the link and discovered this forum, I was overcome with a feeling of warmth that only comes with recognizing a new group of people who appear to have taken my blogging efforts to heart...

"Ah yes, Keoni Galt, whose greatest fear in life is non-organic food, and who tried to talk a friend of mine into going paleo/low-carb during her pregnancy. (Thank God the people who care about her stopped that before it got started.) He's paranoid as all hell, and there's nothing he won't politicize."

All day long I think of things but nothing seems to satisfy...




Despite the insults, I must express appreciation for the kiwifarmer that nominated me for a Lolcow, because he finished up with a ringing endorsement of the blog:

"He writes this badly all the time on his blog. That is just scratching the surface of his madness."

 This guy gets it! Thanks to Kiwifarmers, I can finally understand and appreciate why normal, sane people object to all of my bad writing that barely scratches the surface of my madness. Some of those other kiwifarmers, however, failed to give me my just due and questioned my moral certitude:

"...it's kind of odd that he says you surrender your right to reason when you force someone to act against his will, and yet he owns guns. I guess killing a trespasser is morally better than asking him to leave or else."

I'm trying to figure out the train of logic here....by owning guns, I force someone to act against his will? Asking a trespasser to leave is morally better? I'm confused....oh wait, another kiwifarmer clarified:

"He doesn't bluntly state or show he owns fire arms, being a doomsday whiner I wouldn't rule out he's the hugest of faggots, the 22lr hoarder who's no gunz. God damn it I hate them so much."

This hateful homophobia is so hurtful! I can't even! Now I have to desperately seek out a safespace to gather myself together and try to bolster up my self-esteem so I can try and carry on...

Sadly, I'm not the only one who's been attacked by the hateful homophobes at Kiwifarms...


Clearly this person is mistaken. A hateful, transphobic racist promoting site like Kiwifarms would never receive boosted Googliath rankings in this currently enlightened age...this is 2019!

When I got to the final entry on my Lolcow thread, I discovered that I'm still good for the lulz afterall...even though the kiwifarmer who apparently nominated me for Lolcow status is no longer around their forum, my blogging still gives him legit cred for such productive Lolcow farming:

"@chimpburgers may be gone from us, but the cows he brought to us are still going strong. Mr. Galt posted this earlier this month ranting about the differences between "food" and "feed" (hint: anything that is fattening and thus, triggering to him, he calls "feed")"

It's called food magic, and it most definitely triggers me! Given the Kiwifarmer's linkage as proof of my Lolcow status, I quickly re-read the post she linked to in order to find out where I defined feed as "...anything fattening and thus, triggering:"

Food is grown, raised, harvested and processed -- and if not consumed while fresh -- preserved in as natural and organic a state as possible to keep most of it's nutritious and nourishing qualities intact.

Feed is mass produced by a few large multinational corporations using bio-technological innovations to quickly and efficiently manufacture product units ready for global distribution and a near infinite shelf life.

Clearly this fattening feed that triggers me is evidence of my paranoia...I can't even!

Speaking of fattening triggers...

...when I followed the other older link that enjoyed heightened Googliath rankings when searching for this blog URL found a link to an old page at the website of a person who is no stranger to the denizens of the Mandrosphere:

Mammoth Hunter!


I forgot this guy dedicated an article (Hawaiian Libertarian: “Misogyny is the key to male liberation from blue pill delusions.”) to myself back in 2012! Surely such an old article deserves the highest rankings when searching for the latest from a blogger 7 years later...

But my bemusement was short lived. The manboobz mammoth hunter has also had his good name attacked and smeared by the Kiwifarmers! His Lolcow title? David "Proud Cuck" Futrelle - Owner of "We Hunted The Mammoth" and Supreme White Knight"

Proof indeed that Kiwifarmers are part of a hate site that should be shutdown and thrown in jail by FedGov! Just look at the hateful, hurtful bigotry they subject him to:

"So he's feminism's biggest A-Log, huh?

Why did he change the name of his site? Was "Manboobz" considered "body-shaming"?

"Oh, I've read that blog a couple times. I could have sworn the owner was a stereotypical fat feminist lesbian, though I guess I wasn't that far off."

"He also runs this increadibly dumb tumblr: {link redacted} Pretty much just there to mock women who aren't drinking 3rd wave koolaid while both failing to be funny and failing to see the irony of shitting on women being ok when he does it."

"Weird how these freaks always have history of defending child pornography. Actually, not weird at all, hopefully this fat fuck has his CP stash found and is sent to rot in jail."

"Futrelle has made himself an expert on the “manosphere”" such an achievement!"

"And, still, Futrelle looks less likable than the people he writes about. Imagine that."

"I think it’s safe to say Dave himself has never been on a date before. The only women I imagine he’d ever have a chance of dating are literal whales, certainly not any decently attractive girls."

"Chimping out by stealing content from people he hates seems like all this guy does. lol"


Wow, the Kiwifarmers let me off pretty easy in comparison! I wonder if searches for Futrelle's website on Googliath turn up Kiwifarms Lolcow thread in the top rankings like it does for mine?

{quick google search}

Nope.

I guess not all Lolcows are equal, some are more equal than others.


7 comments:

  1. "But this week you have been hidden to the 2nd page of search results with no autocomplete ..."

    WELL FUCK THAT SHIT BITCH
    LET'S GET YOU DOWN TO THAT THIRD PAGE
    THE ONLY PEOPLE HERE SHOULD BE DJs
    WHO WANT THAT TWENTY MINUTE VERSION

    So you know they've got Sunspot Pikachu running everything at Google now?

    And how he's also the head of Alphabet?

    Well, why do you think they created Alphabet in the first place?

    It wasn't so Alphabet could manage "its other bets" ... haha, yeah, stupid joke, get better material you ass hats.

    It was so the Three Head Honchos could keep those uppity plebs coming up through the ranks from going Full Bolshy on their asses and taking over everything before they could cash out the way they wanted to cash out.

    All of you Google retards who thought you could earn your way to the top? Did you lose your way back to the turnip trucks you fell off of?

    Because God Save The Red Queens if Mister Christian gets to send Bligh and his two BFFs off in a dinghy before they've even landed!

    So let's see if we can get you on Page Three of those search results.

    Admit it, now you want to test how far this goes before you hit the "Blog Formerly Written By An Antipodean Texan" level of Motivational Editorial Theatrical Hiatus head-twisting.

    Oh, and as for those other commenters?

    WHO ARE YOU CHUMPS THAT STILL USE GOOGLE?
    BITCH, IT'S DUCKDUCKGO OR ANYONE ELSE NOW ON
    UNLESS YOU WANT G-MEN TO R0LL & PWN YOU
    AND YOU LOVE CONFINEMENT LOAF IN CHINESE PRISONS

    Still want to use Google like a bunch of chumps?

    This week send the right message by searching Google for "nuclear bomb porn", "anthrax porn", "sweaty explosive porn", or even "bomb disposal tentacle porn".

    Maybe your searches will pervert the flow of the Internet's normal Popcorn For Plebs With Sweaty Palms, who knows ... but I'm pretty sure those pwn-and-r0ll G-Men are wondering where we come up with this shit.

    I AM NOT AN ORDINARY WHACKALOON
    I AM AN EXCEPTIONAL WHACKALOON
    AND AS OF THIS WEEK?
    NOW I HAVE A CROSSBOW, MACLANE
    HO-HO-HO RIGHT BACK AT YOU

    :-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. HL, what RPers uses Googliath to search for RP? I sense unrequited emotional attachment. I hate to say this but little further investment in blogging is healthy, and you know it. You think you can help RPers who use Googliath to find you? You think your critics are human and redeemable? Ah, my friend. I wish I could get you to see things my way emotionally. I will be forthright and say I don't believe everything you say about feed and sun exposure. I do believe you are closer to the truth than most. Why tear yourself down by social investment in inferiors what can by their very nature only hurt you? As I have written, the culling is calling. Your job is to win existence and as possible prosperity for your lineage if not also for yourself. You are not a race. I mean look at these normies; pick any race of them. Progress is not redemption of every pos. And look at my emotional investment in this comment. I like some social affirmation, of course, but I diet on information and 'togetherness' as much as I can stand. Merry Christmas, not that I believe.

    ReplyDelete
  3. "So let's see if we can get you on Page Three of those search results.

    Admit it, now you want to test how far this goes before you hit the "Blog Formerly Written By An Antipodean Texan" level of Motivational Editorial Theatrical Hiatus head-twisting."

    Crackpot, you are definitely a Whackaloon extraordinaire! lol

    @ RD, "Why tear yourself down by social investment in inferiors what can by their very nature only hurt you?"

    I have zero investment in critics, google rankings or "success" at blogging. I blog for the love of writing in this medium. In another life, I like to think I should've been a writer (of course, one who BADLY needs an editor...) but my life didn't work out that way. So blogging scratches an itch for me, and that's it.

    In 12 years of hacking at my keyboard, my motivations for doing this thing remain the same. I have no desire to attain fortune or efame...and I find these folks that deride and revile me to be quite entertaining when I've got a few spare moments and I log on and look at who actually responds to my blogging. I never even heard of Kiwifarms til I saw the incoming linkage to my blog.

    I spent about an hour or so poking around their forums reading all there gossip and rumormongering over all there various Lolcows, and I was momentarily amused. But when I found that Futrelle was one of there Lolcows as well, I had that itch, so I scratched.

    And Merry Christmas to you too, even though you don't believe, the sentiment is real! :)

    Aloha!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hello Mr. Keoni and everyone and I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas to come.

    Great article. Amen!

    ~ Bro. Jed

    ReplyDelete
  5. "But when I found that Futrelle was one of there Lolcows as well, I had that itch, so I scratched ..."

    If Fattrolle is making you itchy, you need a new prescription and you need to cease using that Absurdly Expensive Topical Lotion That Really Costs Only 23 Cents In China.

    Because obviously your GP has you on the wrong stuff if that's still an itch.

    "I never even heard of Kiwifarms ..."

    You'd think they'd be into LOLsheep instead of LOLcows.

    But then they'd get the Mad Scrapie and turn into LOLcows themselves.

    OH SO THAT'S HOW IT HAPPENED :-)

    ReplyDelete
  6. The Old Gods Return

    ReplyDelete

  7. Great, funny article and your blog is now back on top in Gaagle when searching for “hawaiian libertarian” ahead of the braindead critics

    the blog was definitely suppressed for several weeks, but right after your post it’s back on top.. Very deliberate, some bugman in a California office trying to see what they can get away with.

    I’m skeptical of DuckDuckGo. They feel like a controlled opposition search engine; they used Gaagle API for awhile, and now they use Bing API and Amazon servers.

    Try an image search of “Americans” on all 3 search engines — all their results are similarly pozzed.
    Try the same search on Yandex (Russian search engine) and they actually feature images of happy Americans, not a gaggle of protesting migrants wearing the flag as a veil (the 6th image on DuckDuckGo)

    Gaagle still works for technical searches but they and all the other big American tech companies are increasingly censoring and filtering information on so many important topics — politics, finance, health, science…

    Even people who try to think for themselves and find non-controlled news, views, and communities will have a harder and harder time finding them. Sad!

    cheers and Merry Christmas!

    ReplyDelete