The Primary Trait of the AMC: Fearful Dishonesty

Of all the articles I've written for the Spearhead, my personal favorite is Avoiding the Fate of the AMC. For those who've not read that article, AMC stands for Average Married Chump.

This is because just about everything contained in that article is based on my own experiences and escape from that sackless state of pathetic beta-tude. I was the Average Married Chump, and I nearly became the divorced and broken chump because of it.

Of course, when I sit back and take stock of my life and the path I have followed, I see some things in a much different perspective than how I did when I was an AMC.

The biggest transformation I've endeavored to undertake is to live my life according to this Hawaiian concept called Pono. Roughly translated, it means righteous. It's become my favorite question I pose to myself when I'm confronted with a situation that requires a choice I have to make with regards to how I react or respond in my interactions with not just my wife, but with all people. What is the path of pono?

I've come to realize the key to this philosophy is total honesty...honesty tempered with discretion of course. As I wrote back in the AMC article for the Spearhead, while quoting Roissy:

* Do NOT be afraid of her emotional state. She is a woman, and emotional instability is simply how she is designed. As Roissy stated so eloquently in his The 16 Commandments of Poon:

You are an oak tree. You will not be manipulated by crying, yelling, lying, head games, sexual withdrawal, jealousy ploys, pity plays, shit tests, hot/cold/hot/cold, disappearing acts, or guilt trips. She will rain and thunder all around you and you will shelter her until her storm passes. She will not drag you into her chaos or uproot you. When you have mastery over yourself, you will have mastery over her.

Striving to live an honest existence is one of the keys to self-mastery.

When I was an AMC, I was a liar. A dishonest weasel. I lied all the time. Most all of it was so-called "white lies." And it wasn't just in relation to my wife, but with my peer group, my work-place colleagues and school classmates...everyone.

This was because I lived my life afraid to upset other people. I tried to always find what I mistakenly thought of as the path of least resistance. To use dishonesty to avoid conflict. For instance, if I were invited to participate in something I did not care to, I would scramble for a convenient excuse -- A LIE -- instead of being honest and straightforward and saying, "no thanks, I'm not interested in doing that."

The real problem with that is when you spin webs of deceit, you eventually get tangled up and caught. It is inevitable if your whole social life is based on trying to avoid upsetting people by lying to them. And from the perspective of the woman you are having a relationship with, it is the ultimate respect-killer.

This is the path of beta-ization. You want to be an alpha? Than learn how to live your life with absolute, unapologetic honesty. As I wrote earlier though, being honest doesn't mean you have to tell everyone everything. Circumspect discretion is the easiest means of maintaining a code of living honestly.

One of the reasons why I'm writing this post, is because of an experience I had this past weekend caused me to ruminate extensively on this topic. A long time friend of mine is getting married, and Saturday night was his bachelor party. Several of my married friends attended the event. While we were socializing, I asked one of my friends (who I know is definitely an AMC) if his wife knew that he was at this bachelor party. Since he lives in fear of his wife's emotional state, and she obviously wears the pants in his household, I already knew the answer, but I pursued the line of questioning to try and help him see the error of his ways. He had lied and told her that he was going to a family members house. He was afraid that she would be upset that he was attending a bachelor party with strippers entertaining. I told him he should have been honest with her and came to the bachelor party even if she expressed disapproval and was upset. He looked at me with sheer disbelief and asked if my wife knew where I was.

I laughed and told him my wife knows exactly where I'm at and what I'm doing. He couldn't comprehend having a relationship like that. It's called unapologetic honesty. And my friend? He got away with his lie...until pictures from the party got posted on Facebook and his wife saw him. He's now in the doghouse and going through the hellish torment of being an AMC. The root of his troubles was believing that being dishonest would make things easier for his relationship. By operating out of the fear that his wife would be upset that he wanted to go to our friend's bachelor party, he ended up upsetting her far worse than if he had simply told her the truth and attended the party over her objections. I think he's currently sleeping on the couch.

Take the old axiom to heart - honesty IS the best policy. If you can't be honest about something, than you probably shouldn't be doing it in the first place.

The Sun Rises in the East

I started writing this comment, than realized it reached post-worthy length, so here it appears, rather than where it was originally composed.


I like Susan Walsh and her blog, Hooking Up Smart.

Interesting blog, interesting perspective, unique comment section.

That being said...after reading this entire thread and it's comments, Dalrock's take on this entire conflict looks accurate to me:

Susan appears to have taken my repeated efforts to keep any disagreement from becoming personal as a sign of weakness. Instead of debate the issue, she scolded me like a dog which just soiled the carpet. She has never yet either defended her claim or withdrawn it. In place of debate, she kicks up dust and makes accusations. She wanted to make it personal; she outright insisted. So be it.

Logic has cornered Feminine emoting.

Is Frivolous Divorce Overstated in the Manosphere?

Not just no, but HELL NO.

In the face of indisputable logic, dissembling is the female's primary defense.

This is what Susan is doing here.

Saying so does not mean I am "piling on" or "attacking" her (please note the first line of this post).

I'm just pointing to the rising sun and saying - "The Sun rises in the East."

When a woman engages her emotions because she feels attacked, this is what she defaults to. I've been married for 14 years and counting now, and believe you me, I understand this perfectly.

It's a very hard earned wisdom to learn to recognize this dynamic in action between your wife and yourself. Ignorance of this nearly lead to a frivolous divorce of my own on several occasions.

All women do this when they FEEL attacked...and it's obvious that Susan feels attacked here.

Dalrock has consistently reminded her (and everyone else) that he's endeavored to keep the debate impersonal and respectful, and focused solely on the conflicting ideas:

@Susan Walsh

I’m no victim, just a realist. Dalrock has had me in front of the firing squad several times before, lol.

This only makes sense if your definition of “firing squad” is “challenged me to back up my statements in a non personal way”. I’ve gone out of my way to frame any disagreements we have as not personal, and have repeatedly asked my readers to offer you the same courtesy. I only wish you had responded in kind. This is a sphere of intellectual debate, sometimes involving strong intellectual disagreement.

That you can’t separate this from the personal suggests to me that you aren’t cut out for what you are doing. You have a worldwide platform, are mentioned in the national media, and I’m sure have thousands of hits a day on your site. Yet you want to be allowed to say whatever you want as “your own truth”, and anyone who challenges this (even while taking pains to make it non personal) is a mean man who hurt your feelings.

IMO, Susan has failed to refute Dalrock's logic and he has accurately called her out on her dissembling.

All that being said, I'm not commenting here to declare a winner.

(I still like Susan, her blog and I still endorse that others continue to read her.)

Rather, I'd like to make an observation:

This entire debate is similar to an argument between a husband and wife, in which the husband is arguing with logic and the wife is arguing with emotion.

Logic vs. Emotion = masculine frame vs. feminine frame

The thread is an excellent example of Dalrock demonstrating "married man game" in this debate.

Of course, for a happily married father in a post-feminist world, he makes it look effortless.

It's much harder for a husband who is not aware of the subtext of his logic-based argument vs. her emotion-based response frame of interaction with his wife, and mistakenly thinks that they are both discussing a point of logic.

Husbands don't like to see their wives upset or angry. When we don't know any better (take the blue pill), we seek to appease and end the emotional onslaught, even when we know we are logically correct.

This is precisely how the AMC (Average Married Chump) often finds himself "winning" an argument, but still losing it in the long run. That's because he acceded to her frame instead of reaffirming his own.

You proved your point, you were 100% correct...yet you're still sleeping on the couch.

See the similarities with this current debate?

Because Susan is generally well regarded in the manosphere (note regular manosphere commenter Clarence's vigorous defense; note once again the first thing I wrote in this comment,) and has had good will and a history of positive interactions with Dalrock and many other manosphere bloggers, Dalrock could have relented his frame and offered Susan an easy out here and not held her feet to the fire of his logic in an effort to soothe this all over.

"Can't we all just get along?"

This is the temptation husbands face with upset wives.

Take note men. When you are right, and you know it...act like it, no matter how upset she appears to get, no matter how much of a soft spot you may have for her. That is the only way you both "win" an argument.

Avoiding the Fate of the AMC

From the SpearheadFiles
February 14, 2010

In the terminology of the Venusian arts aka "Game," the acronym AFC, stands for Average Frustrated Chump. This article deals with an even sadder specimen of the male species – the Average Married Chump.



Disclaimer: This article is intended for those of us suckers, fools, naive idiots and morons that either got married before we knew better (such as myself), or are dumb enough to sign on the dotted line for Marriage 2.0. despite knowing better. Yes, we get it, all you MGTOW-ers and PUA-ers – getting into Marriage 2.0 with a Western Woman is dumb, crazy and foolhardy. Better to go your own way and avoid women altogether…or just game the young sluts or crazy cougars for commitment free, protected sex. Believe me…we get it.

Nevertheless, there are men that have or intend to get married. This column is intended for those of us that are crazy and foolhardy enough to think we can actually marry a Western woman and and have children to create a family – and not be emasculated, pussy-whipped, cheated on, cuckolded, divorced and ass-raped with vagina-mony and child support judgments in our Soviet-styled family court system. In fact this article is actually about how a married man under today’s marriage 2.0 regime can actually do his own part to avoid all of the pitfalls and dangers of today’s divorce – child support racket.

I write this disclaimer, simply because I’ve observed numerous discussions of marriage in the “man-o-sphere” invariably always have a chorus of MGTOW-ers and PUA-ers that always have to weigh in with their “you married guys are idiots” or ” it’s best to avoid marriage all together.”

Thanks guys…we already know. We still have to deal with our own realities, and telling us over and over again how stupid or foolish we are may make yourself feel better about yourself and the path you chose to follow…but it doesn’t actually help those of us that are already married or who intend to get married and have children in the future.



Most of us already know what Marriage 2.0 means. Most Spearhead readers know about the history of the feminist movement and it’s deliberate and destructive unleashing of the demons of unrestrained female sexuality upon society. They actively subverted and corrupted Marriage 1.0 – the institution of Patriarchy – to deliberately destroy the foundation for civilized society, so as to build a Brave New World Order based on the illusion of “gender equality.” That, of course, was merely the mechanism to inculcate a sense of victim-hood into women so that they would rebel against the gender roles that were clearly defined under Marriage 1.0, and forgo getting married at a young age when they are most fertile, so that the likelihood of having multiple children in stable  homes with a Father as the primary authority figure in that home, would become a near obsolete anachronism. The proof is in the pudding – the Demographic decline of the West is a fact, and proves that the real goal of feminism was and is all about population control.

By taking up the mantle of Patriarch, and having a successful marriage with multiple children -- while increasingly dangerous to men and their children under the current feminist regime -- is in fact a blow to those that seek to prevent the formation of stable, male-headed nuclear families in the first place.

So what can you, as a man, do, to become that Patriarch whose wife and children love and respect?

While it is a complex issue – and there are so many variables at play, it is impossible to ensure ONE CORRECT way to make a marriage in today’s feminazi-fucked world work, there are a number of things you can do to at least lessen the odds as much as possible.

To start with, there are a few things that all men who are contemplating marriage need to consider:

The Principle Feature of Female Sexuality is Hypergamy

Unless you understand this principle fully and completely, you will have trouble in your marriage.

To put it succinctly – the key to surviving — and indeed, even thriving — in marriage 2.0, is to behave and conduct yourself as if you were in marriage 1.0…the old school definition. You must "wear the pants." You must be the literal and figurative Head of your household. If you cannot do this, than marriage in today's Brave New World Order is not for you. You should indeed go your own way or confine yourself to gaming women for short term relationships with no commitment implied or given.

Remember: NO woman respects a man she can rule. Any man she can rule, is a man she will have contempt for. Any man she has contempt for, she simply cannot lust. And if she doesn’t lust you, she certainly will not “love” you.

To put it even simpler than that, you need to understand the key to a successful marriage is establishing and maintaining a relationship based on the reality of her hypergamous instincts. The first thing you must do to ensure success, is of course to choose the “right” woman.

So what are the qualities of the “right” woman? After all, we men of The Spearhead, hold a special scorn for women that continually make the empty claim “Not all women are like that!”

In terms of morality, attitudes and behavior, indeed, not all women are “like that.” There are women who have been raised in an environment that makes it far more likely she will have the self-control, maturity and awareness to accept your leadership role to make sure you have a successful marriage.

In short…here are the characteristics that make a successful marriage with a Western Woman more likely -

* Was she was raised in an intact, happy nuclear family?

This is perhaps THE most important prerequisite you should have in assessing whether or not the great risks involved with marriage in today’s society are worth taking on with any particular woman. In many ways, we human beings develop the same attitudes, behaviors, habits and ethics of the people who raise us. From childhood, we are given a template of life that we both consciously and subconsciously follow. Women from a broken home were raised within that template. When a woman comes from a broken home and raised by a single mother, she will internalize the same attitudes and behaviors of her mother, the same attitudes that broke her own mother’s home up greatly increases the chances that she will break up your own home that you try to make with her as well. This is especially true if she comes from a broken home for which the mother places all of the blame for the breakup of the marriage on the ex-husband/father.

* Does she have a positive, respectful relationship with her Father?

Take careful note of any prospective wife’s relationship with her father (the guy she considers as the primary male that raised her..not necessarily her bio-dad). Does she respect him? Is he an authority figure to her that she admires, and will listen and follow his advice? If she doesn’t respect the male authority of the home she was raised in, she’s not going to respect your attempts at exercising male authority in your home either.

* Is she is younger than you?

This one factor really gives a man a “head-start” in establishing a relationship of proper balance – one in which the man and the woman fulfill their complementary gender roles. It also increases the likelihood that she is either a virgin or relatively inexperienced. By virtue of your older age, you will hopefully have accomplishments, achievements and experience that she will admire and respect. She will be “looking up to you” from the very beginning. That’s a much easier place to maintain your “up” status if your relationship is founded on that to begin with. Besides, if your goal is to have multiple children, it doesn’t make sense to marry an older woman. How many kids did Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore have again?

* Does she have a sense of moral awareness and justice?

Observe her attitudes and beliefs when she is presented with scenarios, dramatized performances or real life examples of the issues that are directly related to marital success. What is her opinion of a friend that she knows is cheating? Does she condone, excuse or justifies her friends or family members doing things like cuckolding, cheating, or divorcing? What are her opinions of movie stars, rock or pop stars and other celebrities that engage in all sorts of marriage destroying behaviors? Does she hold men and women equally accountable? Does she think it was perfectly alright for Tiger Woods wife to hit him with a golf club? Take stock of all the examples that show her attitude when they present themselves. All of the attitudes she expresses that adhere to what feminist society would consider ‘politically correct’ are bright, red flags.

Ignore them at your own risk.

* What are her life goals? Does she understand the realities of her own biological clock and the opportunity costs of pursuing the education/career track versus having children?

Listen to what she says are her primary goals in life. Is she following the feminist script of education-career- then maybe a kid or two onto the road of fulfillment and "having it all" as a supermom? Or is she perfectly content to stay home and raise children? Will she support you in your own career goals? Will she complement your own life’s mission goals…or is she determined to set her own goals (which inevitably end up competing with yours, not complementing them.)

* How does she manage money and credit?

Is she a compulsive shopper? Does she consider shopping to be a primary form of entertainment? Most importantly…does she have credit card debt? If she finances her compulsive clothes shopping with credit cards that she never pays off in full, she will be dragging you into debt slavery right along with her after the wedding. Oftentimes, the “experts” will cite “money troubles” as the leading factor in a marriage breaking up. In politically incorrect terms, this usually means she spends more than they can pay off, and she resents him for failing to “provide.”



Now, let’s just say you think you’ve found “the one” who fits the bill. A woman that is least likely to give you the gift of a broken home, child support/vagina-mony mandated slavery and alienated children. You go ahead and get married.

While the previous list of characteristics are definitely founded on the principle that “not all women are like that,” after all, not all women are raging sluts living the feminist dictated lifestyle, it is after marriage, when you settle down into a routine of daily living with each other, that in fact you will find out that ALL women ARE indeed just like that.

Lose her respect, let her take the role of authority in the house, and you’ll see how ALL women are driven by their hypergamous instincts. While she may be in fact a woman who steadfastly doesn’t believe in divorce…who takes her vows seriously (probably because of a religious belief), perhaps she won’t divorce you — but eventually you’ll wish she did. Her contempt for you and your emasculated state will absolutely pollute your home environment. Her disrespect for you will infect your children, poison the atmosphere and you will end up with what is commonly known as a “dysfunctional” family.

How do you avoid this? Here’s a list of bullet points to consider:

- Strive to lead your home on solid moral principles, especially focused on honesty.

- Study “Game” or learn the art of seducing women. Than seduce your wife…over and over again.

- Don’t become predictable.

- Constantly DHV (Demonstrate Higher Value). Always remind her at every opportunity that presents itself as to how lucky she is to be married to YOU.

- “Neg” her regularly with light-hearted, playful teasing.

- Learn to recognize her shit tests.

- Understand that ULTIMATUMS are the ultimate shit test. Never, ever, EVER give in to an ultimatum.

- Call her on her bullshit…the biggest of which is using sex as a bargaining chip. The second you give into her attempts to make sex a bargaining tool, you’ve placed your sex life into the category of competitive rather then complementary. It’s a power play you WILL lose.

- Be decisive and confident. Ask her for her opinions…but NOT her approval. This also ties in with not being predictable. Plan things for her and your family to do…but don’t tell her about it. Just tell her “we got plans, get ready.” Give her as little details as possible — only enough to ensure she wears the appropriate apparel. Tease her whenever she asks about your plans…in this way, you build up her sense of anticipation and mystery. If you learn to do this right, you can actually make her excited about doing things that would otherwise be repetitive and mundane.

- Never let her dictate big purchasing decisions. You can take her opinion into account…but remember that you should have final say. No bargaining either. “We’ll get the minivan now, you can buy your sports car later.”

- Maintain friends and interests of your own…especially those considered “masculine.” Hunting, fishing…whatever. Something for which you can go and do without her. Never give up your hobby or recreation ESPECIALLY if she tries to get you to stop. Hunters, hunt. Fisherman, fish. Surfers, surf. Skiers, ski. Ballplayers, play ball. She knows what kind of guy she’s marrying and the hobbies he enjoys. Her trying to get you to quit your hobby or activity is really just a shit test to see how much of a spine you have.

- Never EVER let her “OWN THE HOUSE.” Don’t let her designate one area as your “man cave” and the rest of the house is her domain to decorate and furnish as she desires. Let her have some rooms…like bathrooms and kitchens (especially since your not going to marry a woman that isn’t spending significant time in the kitchen in the first place…). Make sure the common rooms have evidence that a MAN lives there too. This, of course, does not mean you shouldn’t have your own “man cave.” Just make sure it is not the ONLY room in the house that looks like a man dwells there.

- Do NOT be afraid of her emotional state. She is a woman, and emotional instability is simply how she is designed. As Roissy stated so eloquently in his The 16 Commandments of Poon:

"You are an oak tree. You will not be manipulated by crying, yelling, lying, head games, sexual withdrawal, jealousy ploys, pity plays, shit tests, hot/cold/hot/cold, disappearing acts, or guilt trips. She will rain and thunder all around you and you will shelter her until her storm passes. She will not drag you into her chaos or uproot you. When you have mastery over yourself, you will have mastery over her."

If all this seems like a little too much to remember, there is a simple shortcut you can use to keep yourself in check. When talking with her, or contemplating talking to her, you can maintain the correct relationship dynamic by asking yourself a very simple question in your mind: “Am I talking to her as if she were my lover…or as if she were my mother, and I her child?”


You don’t ASK FOR PERMISSION to do anything. That’s what a kid does, begging mommy for permission.

She’s not your mommy…never forget that. Because as soon as you fall into that role, you will become that AMC. That pathetic version of a walking zombie, trapped and miserable in a sexless marriage to a woman that doesn’t respect you, and is not motivated to stay in shape and attractive for you.

We all know that marriage in this day and age is mostly a bad deal for men…nevertheless, if you do decide to take the plunge, remember that you do have some control in how it turns out.



Notable Commentary from the Original Post


Wulf February 14, 2010 at 14:26:

Excellent article and advice.

I did it, but not with an American girl.

25 years ago I realized my choices here in the U.S. were dubious at best, so I chose to marry a Chinese girl from overseas. In-laws 15,000 miles away is an assetand a Chinese father-n-law will tell his daughter to “fly-right” if he senses anything negative over the phone.

We’ve had a girl and a boy together. They are out of High School and the daughter is on her own. Parenting in today’s culture of death is quite difficult.


Elusive Wapiti February 14, 2010 at 16:39:

Amen Amen Amen.

In my first marriage I married a peer with well-hidden justice issues and with parents who disliked me.

She also had a thick umbilicus to Mommy–I recommend that fellow readers add this to your list. A difficulty in cleaving from one’s parents will be a barrier to cleaving to you.

All of these led to marriage destruction and my enslavement.

I remarried a woman 7 years my junior whose parents like me and who don’t sow seeds of discord. The difference is amazing. While I don’t do all the things you recommend, I do quite a bit. Bottom line is that I’m much happier.

PS happy v-day to everyone.


Welmer February 14, 2010 at 16:47:

"Elusive Wapiti wrote:She also had a thick umbilicus to Mommy–I recommend that fellow readers add this to your list. A difficulty in cleaving from one’s parents will be a barrier to cleaving to you."

Yes, in-laws can wreck a marriage. I think baby boomer mother in laws are awful. I’m worried that if I meet another woman I’ll be very distrustful of her parents, if not outright hostile toward them. I was always a polite, accommodating son in law, and for that I got a knife in my back and my children hijacked by my MIL.

Is Your Home a Haven or a Hellhole?

The blogger at Mormon Men has announced that he recently filed for divorce.

Having extended family members who are Mormon, I understand that this is a somewhat heavy decision not taken lightly, since one of the primary tenets of the Mormon church is people who are married, are married for eternity, in this world and in the next.

Given the quality of his blogging and his harsh introspection of himself and his own role in his marriage that brought him to this point, I'm quite certain he has come to realize he had no other choice.

Once you take the red pill, there is no going back to the blue pill.

One realization he came to in explaining his reaction to his decision really resonated with me:

The most persistent feeling I get however is a sense of relief: relief at having not brought children into this, relief at not having to be a punching bag any longer, relief at being able to come home to my dog and have my house be a haven instead of the place I have to be the most on my guard.

One point I frequently reiterated in my past posts regarding relationship dynamics, and the plight of the Average Married Chump, is for men to ask yourselves if a behavior you are engaging in is the behavior of a man interacting with his lover....or a little boy answering to his angry mother.

If it's the latter, than chances are you are living the uncomfortable and hellish existence of the AMC. As I wrote in The Primary Trait of the AMC: Fearful Dishonesty:

Take the old axiom to heart - honesty IS the best policy. If you can't be honest about something, than you probably shouldn't be doing it in the first place.

Are you afraid to come home and deal honestly with your wife?

Are you fearful of what you think will be her anger and disapproval if you tell what you're doing, feeling or thinking?

If this is how you feel, you are not living in a real home.

Remember the old saying, "Home is Where the Heart is?" That only applies if you relish being in your home in the first place. And that 'aint gonna happen if you live every waking moment in your home, fearful of upsetting your wife. Lying to her to try and avoid upsetting her only makes it worse, because even if you don't consciously realize it, you will hate yourself for living a lie.

Home is supposed to be your sanctuary. Your place to rest, relax, and recharge, so that you can get ready to go out and face the world another day...knowing you can come home and let your guard down and just enjoy the company of your family upon your return.

How can you do that when you're afraid of doing or saying something, and than having to deal with an upset tyrant of a spouse?

That is because you are not supposed to be under the dominion of her emotional state in the first place.

This is precisely why so many men work all that overtime when they really don't have to. Or why they always go to bars or clubs or buddy's houses to drink and try and forget the conflict, anger and disapproval they know they are in for when they walk through the door of their home.

I know, because I've lived it.

Things are much different for me now. I look forward to coming home every single day. I look forward to talking with my wife, seeing her smile, hearing her laughter, eating her cooking. There are times where we are invited to attend events and occasions, and I prefer staying home. Home is what you make of it, and the woman you choose to put at the heart of it.

Here's to Mormon Man finding his haven.

The Married Man's Last Stand

I watched the Superbowl yesterday -- good game. Unlike the rest of the NFL football season, I also watched the commercials. Throughout the 17 week season of the NFL, the large corporations that sponsor the games typically show the same 20 or so commericals over and over again during NFL game broadcasts. Such repetitive exposure to commercialized propaganda used to drive me insane.

But I love watching the NFL so much, I considered a nuisance I had to endure to get my enjoyment out of the spectacle of the human chess match that is professional NFL Football.

But a couple of years ago, I switched to a satellite broadcast company for my TV, shutting off the cable and have enjoyed a level of control over the idiot box I previously didn't think possible....with a 100 hour Digital Video Recorder receiver box, I've discovered the joys of recording all the games I want to watch, and than hitting the "skip forward 30 second" button on my remote. So while watching an NFL game, I can literally watch a 3 and-a-half hour broadcast in almost half the time sans all the commercials.

I've gone this entire season without watching even a single commercial.

But, of course, we all know that the Superbowl commands such a large audience, that advertisers will often pull out all the stops to create commercials that are memorable and humorous. So I do have to say, some of the commercials I saw certainly lived up to their Superbowl billing (not that I'm going to start drinking Bud Light and eat Doritos...but some of their commercials were entertaining)!

And...of course, as many people have noted, like everything else on 21st century idiot box, tell-a-vision programming, there were a fair share of misandrist themes found in many commercials. Jay Hammers offered a quick synopsis with youtube links over at the Spearhead highlighting some of the more egregious offenders.

But one commercial really stood out for me...the Dodge Chargers "Man's Last Stand" commercial.

Here's the transcript of the narrative:

I will get up and walk the dog at 6:30am.
I will eat fruit as a part of my breakfast.
I will shave...I will clean the sink afterI shave.
I will be at work by 8 am...I will sit through 2 hour meetings.
I will say yes when you want me to say yes.
I will be quiet when you don't want to hear me say no.
I will take your call..I will listen to your opinion of my friends.
I will listen to your friends opinions of my friends.
I will be civil to your mother.
I will put the seat down...I will separate the recycling.
I will carry your lip balm.
I will watch your vampire TV shows with you.
I will take your socks off before getting into bed.
I will put my underwear in the basket...

And because I do this...I will drive the car, I want to drive.

My first thought was: "And because of this, you will be driving the car you want to drive...while struggling to put gas in the tank because you have to pay your court ordered alimony and child support payments because your now ex-wife couldn't stand being married to an utterly dominated, spineless, feminized little boy, begging Mommy's permission to do anything.

This is THE primary way in which the typical marriage is now portrayed by 21st century tell-a-vision. PUA game lingo refers to the average, plain guy who can't get laid as an Average Frustrated Chump, or: AFC...well tell-a-vision usually portrays the typical married man as an AMC.

I've gotten into my share of arguments over time with various folks in the Man-o-sphere regarding the topics of marriage..I don't intend to rehash them here. However, I will say, any man that is married or is getting married, you need to understand a basic truth here: any marriage that is modeled after the AMC template as promoted by our mass media culture, is one destined for failure and unhappiness.

Women are hypergamous. That means if she can rule you, she will not respect you. If she can't respect you, she certainly can't lust you. And if she can't lust you...

We all know how that ends up in our Brave New World Order's family court system.

Anyhow, I thought I'd give it a go to see how this commercial would be like if it were based on a Man who understands what HEAD OF THE HOUSEHOLD means:

You need to start getting up and walking the dog at 6:30am...you're starting to look a little hefty...you wouldn't want to turn into one of those people of walmart cows?!

You will add some fruit to my breakfast that you are cooking...but DON'T overcook the eggs.

I will shave...I will clean the sink after I shave as well as that clump of your hair out of the bathroom drain...because as the MAN, I realize that the nasty, dirty jobs are MY job around here...and while I do all the things you simply cannot bear to do, like haul the garbage, kill the rodents and insects and yes, clean hair clogs out of drains, you should be cooking me some food or washing the dishes and not complaining about how you "Do Everything Around Here!" Because you don't.

I will be at work by 8 am...I will sit through 2 hour meetings. Because I'm the provider, and I will endure whatever it takes to provide for this household.

I will NEVER say yes when you want me to say yes. If you don't like what I have to say, than make me a sandwich.

You will be quiet when I am doing something that has my interest and requires my concentration.

I will take your call...if I feel like it. If not, I'll call you back later.

I will listen to your opinion of my friends...I may or may not agree with you, but you will NOT choose my friends for me.

What was that your friends said about my friends? Don't they have better things to do than gossip about MY friends?

I will be civil to your mother...if she is civil to me. Respect is a two way street. I have no problem being respectful...to a respectful person in kind.

Put the seat down yourself and quit your squawking....is it really that big a deal for something that takes no time and almost no effort to put it up or down?

I will separate the recycling...after all, that's all bottles from my beer. I'll separate them and turn them in to the collection center, so I can take the refund and buy more beer. See...I got this recycling thing down pat.

Here...carry your own lip balm...isn't that why you carry a purse with everything but the kitchen sink in it in the first place? In fact, while your at it, here...put this in your purse until I need it.

Watch your vampire TV shows when I'm not around. Better yet, stop watching that garbage. Read a book.

I will wear whatever I want to wear before getting into bed...if you don't like it, you can always take the couch.

I will put my underwear in the basket when I'm good and ready to have my laundry done.

And because I do this...I will drive the car, I want to drive, while you can drive the mini-van I bought for you to take the kids to soccer practice.

Wouldn't it be great to see a commercial like that?

Raising Boys in This Brave New World

A reader asks Heartiste the best way to go about raising her son to mitigate or avoid all of the regularly scheduled programming of spiritual, physical and mental emasculation in our mass media-driven Brave New World Order. For a guy who doesn't have kids, and has expressed many times that he won't, his list is surprisingly good, and echoes many of the same approaches and strategies I have in being a "red pill" parent.

 I've been contemplating a post like this for a long while, but have had a bit of writer's block lately that comes and goes, depending on what's going on in my part of the world. Nothing like ripping off another great blogger using another blogger's post as a springboard to get over that hump.

I'm going to take the bits of advice I agree with (I don't necessarily agree with them all) and expand on them a bit with my own perspective, than offer my own list on what Fatherhood to boys entails from a red pill perspective to conclude.

1. Boys don’t need to hear about decline. What they need to hear about are enemies to fight.

Too true. I'll add to this that as they get older, they'll need to recognize that the greatest enemy they will have to fight is themselves. That nothing in life comes easy, that anything worth having or accomplishing requires hardship and struggle, and the biggest obstacle to success will be his or her own fears, doubts, laziness and lack of gumption and toughness.

4. Give your son room to grow into a man. Let him take risks and flirt with danger.

As a Father, this is where his most important task lies - being the guard against over-protective smother-mothering. From the time I was 5 to pre-teen adolescence, my mother didn't want me to have a skateboard, ride a bike without a helmet (in the 80's only dorks and dweebs wore helmets while riding BMX...I always took mine off and hid it in the bushes the moment my mom was outta sight), wouldn't let me sign up for tackle football, martial arts classes, nor let me get a surfboard, nor shoot my friend's BB guns. I eventually got to go and do all that on my own, as a rebellious teenager.

5. Your son will learn how to successfully deal with women by observing his father deal with his mother. The best thing Dad can do for his son is game his Mom.

The greatest influence parents have on their children is setting the example and living the way you want your children to become. Don't be an Average Married Chump.

7. Your son will not want to “share his feelings” with you or Dad. If you want to know what’s on his mind, tell a story lesson from your life. He will subconsciously ingest your story and relate it to his own problems.

Now this is one of the best things Heartiste advises in the entire freakin' post. I grew up with a mother, female public school teachers, Churchian adult influences thoroughly indoctrinated in the Idolatry of Pussy worship, and a mass media culture that all promoted the idea that boys and men are stifled and damaged and stunted by society's expectations that they not cry or talk about their bad feelings. I was always told and encouraged to "share my feelings" and talk about how something made me feel. No matter how many times I was told this, I still remember that it just somehow felt wrong and off kilter to talk about "feelings" and emotions. Everyone said it was supposed to make me feel better, but it never did. It just made me feel gay.

Now I KNOW it's doing this precise thing that leads to men becoming stifled, stunted and damaged! You do not make better boys by trying to raise them as girls! Boys need to be trained to ignore their feelings and not let their emotions cripple them with fear and inaction in the face of adversity. Most boys need to be goaded, berated and taunted (age appropriate language of course) to motivate them to overcome their inner fears and doubts, then praised and rewarded when they do so. Don't be a pussy, you fag.
 

12. Never humiliate his father in front of him. You may find it satisfying, but you’re doing your boy a disservice.

For Mothers, this is probably THE most important thing in the entire post that they need to be mindful of. Not just humiliate, but always speak of the boys Father with respect and deference...even if he's a drunken, abusive, cheating lout that abandoned you and the kids. If you got nothing nice to say about the man you let impregnate you, than keep your mouth shut. Every time you denigrate or humiliate a boy's Father you are doing it to him as well.  

For Fathers, if your wife ever disrespects or tries to humiliate you in front of your children, you need to put the foot down and nip that shit in the bud immediately and with forceful authority. Do not tolerate it one bit. This is where you draw your line in the sand, and if she crosses it, you need to let her know that there are consequences for it.

18. If you are atheist or agnostic, swallow your pride and ensconce him in a religious tradition. The presence of a powerful overseer, true or not, will help ground him and gird his will.

This makes the very first instance I can ever recall such a hedonistic-nihilist-atheist like Heartiste recommending boys need religion. Good call...just avoid exposing him to idolatrous Churchianity. Especially avoid ANY religion being taught on the tell-a-vision.

20. No social media. No iPads. No iPhones. Boys don’t become great men with their eyes glued to a screen like a plugged in Matrix pod. They become great men with their eyes up and searching the horizon.

No X-box. No computer with internet access in their own room. The Palm Zombie Apocalypse has gone Global and the worst thing for his development and growth is to get addicted to the intermittent rewards of electronically transmitted affirmations or worse, developing a regular compulsion to fap to teh Pr0n.

Quarantine them from it as long as you possibly can so that they don't virtually disconnect from the real world.



Heartiste made his list for Mother's raising boys.

Here's my top10 list for Father's raising Boys in our Brave New World:

1) Be militant about his diet, make sure it is nutrient dense and avoid the NAD as much as possible. Don't feed him fast foods, convenience foods, microwaved meals, nor snack foods. As the child grows up, they will be exposed to these things from family, friends, peers, institutions, organizations and group activities. It's unavoidable unless you micro manage every waking moment of their lives. The only thing you CAN do, is make sure they're not getting that crap at home, and that when they do leave the home, they are already full and fueled up with great, healthy food, so even if they do end up eating the junk, they won't eat as much because they are already full of good stuff. It's also good to let him go hungry every so often. There's a difference between hunger and starvation.

There's a reason why I put diet number one on the list. A well fed child (as in given nutritious food and kept from junk feed) is a well behaved child.The differences in behavior between nutritionally nourished children and SAD junk fed ADD rug rats are astounding and dramatic. It is my personal belief born of experience, that feeding them right over a lifetime, will make everything else dealing with parenting much easier.

2) Learn to identify and avoid all feminizing and potentially long term damaging substances found in food, water and personal care products. Soy, fluoride, MSG, artificial sweetners, BPA, GMO foods, all sunscreen products and Big Pharma's utterly ludicrous vaccination schedules.

3)  Unless the boy experiences a serious injury, downplay and ignore all minor bumps, scrapes, falls and bruises. Tell him it's nothing, stop crying (if he is) and get over it. Mother's will want to give comfort and make him feel better. Let her, that's what she's there for. Additionally, as he gets older, you can tell him that the only person in the whole wide world that will ever care if he feels sorry for himself, is his Mom. Don't go seeking sympathy from a single other soul. Nobody but their Mothers cares when males cry. The faster they learn this, the better.

As Dad, your job is to toughen him up. It's a cruel world in current social upheaval and decline, and as things get worse, only the strong will survive and thrive. As soon as the boy is walking and talking, you should be preparing him for this.

4) Let the boy play in the dirt. Let him get covered head to toe in it...and don't let his Mother get upset or try to keep him from getting dirty or from tearing up the grass. Don't be so obsessed with keeping him away from all germs. This will compromise his immune system and impact his long term health. If you're outside doing activities, don't be so freakin' anal about making sure he washes his hands before eating...unless he's been handling raw meat or dogshit, it's okay to eat your lunch with dirty hands. Of course, setting a standard of cleanliness for the dinner table and being presentable amongst fellow diners is a good thing to instill...but don't make Germophobia and the pursuit of immaculate cleanliness an obsession.

5) Make sure you always have at least one family meal a day - preferably dinner, but if it's not possible to have every member present, make it the meal where most if not all can be there. Do not allow the Tell-A-Vision to be on while you eat. Make it a standard daily ritual where the only thing allowed is eating and talking. And most importantly, as a Father, YOU SIT AT THE HEAD OF THE TABLE. I cannot stress that last one enough. Do not let anyone - especially your Wife or Daughter - usurp your place at the table. If you're a religious family, either you say the prayer, or you delegate who blesses the meal.

6) Teach him about honor, and keeping his word. The worst punishments he should ever receive is for acting dishonorably and deliberately lying to manipulate people. Don't make promises you know you can't keep, and keep every promise you make. Also come down hard on him for any and every attempt to try and sow dissension between his Mother and yourself. You must support each other as a united front in matters of discipline and punishment.

7) As soon as he's old enough, martial arts and firearms training. Weight training and both solo and team sports if he's interested as he gets older. Whether he gets interested in sports or not, make sure he receives training and discipline in the arts of violence and strength development as soon and as often as possible. Along with the learning of the ways of violence, instill the appropriate lessons of discipline, control and when to use it. Start nothing, finish everything.

8) When he gets older and approaches puberty, it will be time to teach him "Game." As Father and Patriarch of the household, the best way to teach him this, as Heartiste notes in his tip #5, is by example. He should have no trouble understanding the concepts of Game, attraction and the differences between males and females, since he's already spent his whole life observing the example set by his dad. When you sit him down for 'the talk' and say you cover something like Rollo's excellent Lessons for my Son, you should be able to point out your own actions, behaviors and demeanor as the primary examples demonstrating those principles.

9) Controlled, temporarily painful but not damaging, age-appropriate corporal punishment, measured out dispassionately and sparingly, will be one of the most effective means of instilling respect for your authority. In the past, many Father's relied on their belts, or switches etc. Nowadays it's considered abusive and grounds for CPS taking your kids away. Make sure you only dole it out in private, and that you do so deliberately and unemotionally so as to avoid crossing the line from discipline into abuse. I don't believe men should ever use anything other than their bare, open hands for physical discipline. But a little of it, effectively applied, goes a long way. Done right, the implied threat of physical discipline will be more than enough to ensure compliance and obedience 99% of the time. Your boy should definitely fear his Father.

10) Always make regular time for Father-Son exclusive physical activities AT ALL AGES, doing something you can mentor him in. Hunting, fishing, skiing, surfing, diving, skating, dirt biking, rock climbing, hiking, camping, car re-building, woodwork  etc. It's good for both of you physically, and it gives you something to bond over for a lifetime.

 

Now that's my top 10, but there's one more thing I needed to add that I think is so important, it should stand alone from this list. While I have written about avoiding making boys talk about their feelings, etc., as well as instilling healthy fear of his Father into a boy, as Dad, you also have to demonstrate positive masculine affection and love. This is especially important after you've had to give some corporal punishment. Nothing wrong with hugging or kissing your boy, and telling him explicitly that you love him. You have to be a hard ass most of the time, so that you raise him to be a hard ass, ready for a hard, cruel world. But all stick and no carrot will make him come to hate you, and will also leave him stunted and unable to cope with many of his own conflicting feelings. Show him that as a man, he has no fear or shame in expressing love to other males, and that his own feelings of affection for other males (no homo) are perfectly normal, okay and nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about.

As a man, can you look at your male family members or close male friends straight in the eye and unflinchingly and without any hang ups and say "I love you?" If you can't, then you are letting your emotions cripple your actions.

Oh, and my final thoughts on raising boys (and girls) in our dysfunctional age of declining civilization is also important enough to stand alone from the top 10 list as well: institutionalized education.

Homeschool > Private Same-sex Religious School > Private Same-sex Secular School > Running Wild in the Streets.


Avoid the Government public schooling brainwashing and indoctrination system at all costs. As Vox likes to say, Homeschool or die.

Quiplinks VIII: Messages for Millenials

"From the days of Spartacus-Weishaupt to those of Karl Marx, and down to Trotsky, Bela Kun, Rosa Luxembourg, and Emma Goldman, this world-wide conspiracy for the overthrow of civilization and for the reconstitution of society on the basis of arrested development, of envious malevolence, and impossible equality, has been steadily growing." - Winston Churchill, Illustrated Sunday Herald, February 8, 1920, page 5.

One thing about all this reflection, introspection and rumination that I've engaged in while going through all my old articles at The Spearhead, is that for the first few years of having undertaken blogging, I still considered myself a young man, even though I was in my early 30's.

Now that I'm in my early 40's, I realize that mindset was the result of our Brave New World Order's social engineering programming of arrested development. In retrospect, I realize that as bad as I've been afflicted with a state of arrested development that led me to make a number of life altering decisions that I now regret and have no chance of going back and correcting (You Only Live Once!), I still did not have it as bad as what I see many of the younger generation of people are dealing with.

Those of you who are reading this, and you are in your early years of adulthood...heed these messages of those of us who have been there and done that. You only get one chance at your youth. How you spend it, will have a multitude of effects and affects on the rest of your life.

No one makes that point better than Mike Cernovich at Danger & Play:

"Baby Boomers have sold you a lie. Fifty is not the new thirty and thirty is not the new twenty.

Twenty is twenty and your twenties are a magical, once-in-a-lifetime decade.

Although I feel great at 37: Claiming my body or mind is anything like it was at 27 would be delusional beyond comprehension."

I concur with this completely. "Fifty is the new thirty" and "thirty is the new twenty" are really just vile lies used as marketing slogans designed to sell all the consumers and human resources a host of products and services to profit off of the mass delusion that we can all maintain the illusion of youth and vitality well into the years of natural aging and biological decay. There are no pills, procedures, operations or products that can make as much of a difference in how you age, than developing the habits, skills and disciplines in your young adulthood that carry you throughout the rest of your life.

The choices you make now may well have consequences decades into the future.


Sarah's Daughter makes this point to her own teenage daughters:

The majority of your life will be lived over the age of 40.

One of the most important things you can do in your youth, is to cultivate an attitude and world view that guides your interactions and relationships in life. Nurture gratitude and suppress any feelings of envy and covetousness you may experience. This is one of the keys to finding the nourishment that comes from the synergy of living in symbiosis. Envy is nourishment for the parasite. It inhibits, stunts and potentially even destroys symbiotic organisms.


Uncle Bob at Uncle Bob's Treehouse has repeatedly pointed out how being covetous and envious of others are the roots of many modern evils.

"For years I have been a great reader of "fairy tales," myths and fables (such as Aesop's) and many of them deal with envy and its destructive effects, and gratitude and its beneficial effects.

In fact, these stories tell us you can feel envy, or you can feel gratitude, but you can't feel both."

While Uncle Bob likes to refer us all to fairy tales, myths and fables as timeless messages of truth to be gleaned from ancient cultures that are still applicable today,  Beefy Levinson at Lamentably Sane offers us an admonishment on these principles that are relevant to all young people in the present age,  many of whom are entirely way too absorbed in the use of DHS data harvesting and profiling apps social media:

I learned not to compare myself with others. Social media only shows us what they want us to see.

And what many, many folks post on their Data mining portals for the Panopticon Social media accounts, are really nothing more than solipsistic indulgences meant to inspire envy and covetousness in others, in a misguided attempt to feel better about their own lives. "Look at me! Don't you wish you were doing this too?"



As Henry Dampier notes:

In internet culture, people have become, at least in their perceptions, increasingly disembodied in their approaches to thought and life.

This is I believe, a purposeful and deliberate effect of our increasing dependence on the virtual world as a means of making a living in the real world.

Speaking of making a living in the real world, one of the standout contributors at Return of Kings, Quintus Curtius, raises another great point for young people just entering the work force:

"One of the (many) problems in America today is that there are too many chiefs, and not enough Indians.  Too many cooks, but not enough servers.  Too many shit-talking bastards, and not enough work-horses. You get my drift."

Indeed I do, Quintus. My return to the blue collar trades in the past few years has made me really appreciate this. I've worked with a few young whippersnappers who think they know it all. Pipe down young buck, you don't, and you're just trying to tell me how to do something I've already done and failed at in the past. Don't get butt hurt that I'm ignoring your genius, listen to Zed and get your ass to work and shovel the fuckin' gravel! 




Now, of course, one of the biggest aspects of our deliberately engineered arrested development culture is effected by our mass media inspired worship of the mating dance of the human animal as the ultimate pursuit in life.

It is a deliberate misdirection to extend adolescence to inhibit monogamous pair bonding that results in large families as the foundation of civilized society. Thus we have all endured an endless array of propaganda and cultural brainwashing to destroy our abilities to form meaningful relationships with the opposite sex.

Listen up, you youngsters!

When it comes to the dating and mating scene, things have not always been this fucked up. There was this thing in the 1960's called the "Sexual Revolution," when the Baby Boomers where your age. Those who took part in the rebelling against civilization building norms  are now the Establishment, and the Establishment they preside over is what we are all now dealing with.

I concur with Lena S. of Not Equal But Different, when she states:

"I for one will celebrate the day when the young of this country give a big middle finger to the establishment of aging baby boomers who still fancy themselves revolutionaries, apparently blind to the irony of their operations. They have made themselves obsolete, peddling crackpot theories that are only believable to a deliberately-dumbed down people."

But for young men who wake up to the realities of the modern mating marketplace, beware the trap of hedonistic promiscuity. The red pill can take you down that path, but that way can trap you in a vice of your own making.


As Reality Doug notes:

"Now if you are the dumb animal man, fucking chicks is basically all you need to ponder in your day. If you are a savage, you might also want a grass skirt that holds up wash after wash. If you are a high culture man, you might want to get your philosophy right to get the compass of your life right and to find value, real value, in your character and resourcefulness if no where else in this fucked over global economy."

Many players and pick up artists that spend years in the game, performing as carousel animals for a multitude of sluts to ride on, eventually develop a nagging doubt, a sense of emptiness that results from the meaninglessness of sterilized, contracepted sex with a multitude of strangers.

As Roosh V recently lamented:

"Unless we see drastic world changes in the next 15 years, merely having a pleasant lifestyle and individual freedom is where the trip ends for us, without being able to create our own family."

As a father and family man myself, the joy of having and raising children is unmatched by any other experience I've had in this life. A lot of the problems that we all face in trying to achieve a family come from being mired in an existence that has already been planned out for us to turn us into human resources and debt slave consumers. The system was designed to estrange us from each other, especially our own flesh-and-blood offspring.

Listen up, self-improvement-driven MAndrospherians - just as there are thousands of articles and blog posts written about avoiding the traps of debt, consumerism, avoiding teh pr0n, eating clean and sticking to the discipline of a good work out regiment, with conscious, deliberate planning and choices, the same holds true for seeking to form your own family. Despite the state of the institution and the many real dangers involved, marriage and family are still obtainable if you take it as seriously as anything else you pursue with so-called red pill clarity.

Our society and civilization are in near-terminal decline. But all is not as hopeless. If we ever hope to restore civilized society, it starts with restoring the building blocks of the foundation of civilized society. That means finding a way to create your own Marriage 1.0 under the current regime of Marriage 2.0.

But that doesn't mean marrying the first person you're attracted to and hoping for the best.

You have to be careful, conscientious and deliberate before you take the plunge. As Black Poison Soul notes about modern husbandry in Marriage 2.0:

"In my view: life is too short to cater to somebody else all the time." 

One of my all time favorite sayings is this: the only person you can change is yourself. If you let yourself turn into the Average Married Chump aka the provider-slave that Black Poison Soul refers to, at some point you're going to have to come to the realization that it's not her fault....you conditioned her to treat you like that by your own behavior!

I have written it over and over again in the past on this blog...that I do not recommend marriage to today's youth.

I come now to conditionally recant and retract that sentiment. I see thing's differently with a little bit older and I like to think wiser eyes. It goes back to the conundrum of the Mutilated Beggar Argument that Dr. Daniel Amneus pointed out in his seminal work The Garbage Generation.

"In Cairo there exists a cottage industry which mutilates children to be used as beggars. The more gruesome and pitiable the mutilations, the more the beggars will earn. The disfigured children are placed on mats on street corners with a begging bowl and they ask for alms for the love of Allah.

The almsgiver is doing a good thing and a bad thing. The good thing is paying for the child's next meal. The bad thing is ensuring that more children will be mutilated."

Telling people not to marry and have kids because of how messed up the system is, merely contributes further to the degradation and decline of our society and culture. I now say, take the risk, and go for it. Just be mindful and never forget what a marriage between a man and woman really is, as poetically pointed out over at 80 proof Oinomancy:

"It’s elemental warfare. Men are fire.Women are water...

...should the ideal balance be struck: she confines him to the point of utility and safety, while he boils her enough to power the engine that is the family and its greatest extension: Civilization."

As Vox Day advises:

Giving up what you fear potentially losing means you have already lost.

The ultimate resistance to our Brave New World Order, is to breed the next generation of revolutionaries and freedom fighters. For us Gen X'rs, we're already reaching the age of declining fecundity. You youngsters are our only hope!

The Great Unlearning

"To attain knowledge, add things every day. To attain wisdom, remove things every day." - Lao Tzu

"The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn and relearn." - Alvin Toffler

"The most difficult subjects can be explained to the most slow-witted man if he has not formed any idea of them already; but the simplest thing cannot be made clear to the most intelligent man if he is firmly persuaded that he knows already, without a shadow of doubt, what is laid before him." - Leo Tolstoy

Most of us take it for granted, but teh Interwebz is the greatest library of accumulated human knowledge the world has ever known. For the introspective autodidact, it is without a doubt, the greatest technological advancement in the history of mankind for both good and bad.

The best aspect of this tech, is the empowerment of the individual to do a virtual end-around all of the various gatekeepers of news and information. The Big Government-Big Business entity that is in the process of consolidating their control to bring us under a single one world tyranny can no longer simply use it's control of Big Media to dictate the narrative and control all thought.

On the other hand, the worst aspect of the world wide web is that it makes the Panopticon of Total Information Awareness a.k.a. perpetual surveillance on every citizen, everywhere, technically and feasibly possible.

In the not so distant future, "Unplugging from the Matrix" will no longer be just an allegory or abstract metaphor for contemplation, but an actual, physical action you will have to take (i.e. getting rid of your Mobile Affirmation Devices, unplugging the Tell-A-Vision and any other "smart" appliances, and cease using the Internet from any personally owned computers and devices), if you want to escape the all-seeing eye of Sauron.

But I digress.

The first three quotes I cite in this post, from Yoda (Lucas), Toffler and Lao Tzu, basically sum up my personal experiences with study in the University of the Autodidact. Almost every single facet of my personal life has been transformed, shaped and guided by all that I have learned, unlearned and relearned on teh Interwebz. The way I eat, sleep, cook, clean, shop...the way I socialize, the way I seek recreation, the way I parent my offspring,  interact with my family and friends and the way I conduct myself in public whenever I am out in society at large...nothing I think and do has been unaffected or changed by all this time spent reading and writing in the virtual world.

But it is Tolstoy's quote that is the true impetus for this post.

"The most difficult subjects can be explained to the most slow-witted man if he has not formed any idea of them already; but the simplest thing cannot be made clear to the most intelligent man if he is firmly persuaded that he knows already, without a shadow of doubt, what is laid before him."

This, I think, is what lies behind the never ending cycle of debate and argument over "Game" in the MAndrosphere. Whether it's the Men's (Human) Rights Activists denouncing it as pussy begging or the God-fearing, devout Christians denouncing it as sinful nihilism, it seems to me that those who oppose this thing we call game have their minds firmly made up and are not willing to concede they may be mistaken or wrong, even when they read the anecdotal accounts and testimonies of the many people who weigh in with their own experiences on how discovering this Praxeology helped them learn, unlearn, and relearn how their attitudes, thoughts, posture, demeanor, presentation and confidence play a role in relating to others, male and female alike.

Faced with so many anecdotes of the personal transformations so many folks attribute to game, the ideologically opposed grant no quarter, refuse to spare one inch of concession that perhaps there is something of positive value here. At this point, I have to simply concede the following - if and when you come across the topic of Game on teh Interwebz, you will either "get it," or you won't. If you don't get it, or don't want to get it, great...not my problem. But if you want to tell me I'm wrong, you can try your best to convince me, but at this point I've seen it all before. Give me a new argument, because all of the other ones you've used before fail to overcome the truth of my own personal experiences and observations.

So rather than engage in yet another round of debate by engaging with the naysayers, denouncers and detractors by fisking or responding to any specific objectors posting or comments, I'm going to focus the rest of this post to discuss why I advocate people can gain much from the study of this controversial endeavor.

I also intend (but no guarantees!) for this to be my last and final post on this topic of "WHY GAME?" At this point, I'm done debating and disagreeing over this.





When I first came across the topic of Game on teh Interwebz, I had spent my entire life being indoctrinated and brainwashed into being a NICE GUY. From Generation X onward, this is the mainstream cultural paradigm we were all inculcated with via mass media programming, institutional educational curriculum and for most of us raised as Christians, the Feminine Imperative-based culture of Churchianity.

Discovering the discussion of Game by the PUA's and the PUA wannabes on teh Interwebz was literally THE "Red Pill" that lead me down the path of unlearning all this cultural indoctrination that had turned me into a NICE GUY. When I started reading about such things as hypergamy, shit tests, unapologetic masculinity, dominance, keeping/maintaining frame and how so many aspects of femininity and masculinity have been twisted, distorted and warped, it only took me less than a couple of days of reading and ruminating to grasp the big picture of just how badly I had been learned into dysfunction.

In short, conforming to the Brave New World Order's societal conditioning turned me into a bitch. As Matt Forney notes:

“Bitch” is a common insult, but no one really thinks about what it means. The interesting thing about the word “bitch” is that its meaning is different depending on the sex of who you’re insulting with it.

Female bitches are typically combative, mean, miserable and bossy; in other words, they’re masculine.

Male bitches are typically catty, passive-aggressive, whiny and gossipy; in other words, they’re feminine.

So when you attack someone by calling them a “bitch,” you’re accusing them of failing to live up to the ideal of their sex.

Ah yes, that is precisely what a NICE GUY is, a bitch. Prior to reading up on the topic of Game, I was utterly and completely clueless about how and why I had become one. But boy do I remember those days well:

Why do you have to be so upset all the time?

What should I do? What would you like me to do?

Yes, Dear.

Would you like to do this? How about that?

Please, Hon?

What do you mean you can't do this anymore?

I'm sorry.

What do you mean you're unhappy? How can I make you happy?

Can I call you tomorrow?

Would you like to have sex tonight? Why not? PLEASE?!?!

Girls night out? I hope you have fun with the girls then!

I'm so sorry!

If it will make you happy, than I'll do it.

But I had plans! I made you a nice dinner, and picked up a good bottle of wine and I rented that movie you wanted to see and...... ah well, that's okay. Don't worry about it. You go out and have fun, I'll just save the food in the fridge and reheat it for you tomorrow. Don't worry about, it's not a big deal...I understand the sale ends tomorrow and you and your friends need to take advantage of it while it's so cheap. Have fun, and know that I'll be thinking of you while you girls are shopping! Love you!

Would you like this one, or would you like that one?

Will you accept my apology?

If you don't like it, I have the receipt so that you can return it and get something you do like!

Would you like to hear this song your beauty inspired me to write for you?

I'll make it up to you...I PROMISE!

What do you think about this? Is it good? Do you like it? Maybe you'll like it better if did this instead?

What should we do today?

How come you never want to have sex anymore? 

Why won't you accept my apology?

Wow, he's such a jerk! Why do your friends always go out with guys like that?

Should we go to counseling?

Can I go fishing with Dave this weekend? PLEASE?!?!

Would you like me to hold your purse for you?

Will you make love to me?

Sure I'll get your tampons for you....which brand do you prefer? Absorbent or Super-Absorbent? Do you need any pads, too?

Where do you want to go? What would you like to eat?

OF COURSE you don't look fat in those jeans!

I feel like we need to work on our communication skills. I feel like we don't have meaningful conversations anymore, and I really want us to become more intimate.

Would it be okay if I go surfing with Joe tomorrow? I'll be back in time so we can do something...

NO, I was NOT looking at her!

Okay, I'll sell it or give it away...I don't really need it.

I'm sorry.

Anything you want...I'll do it!

What do you mean I always lie? I do NOT!

Do you love me as much as I love you?

Would you like to hear this poem I wrote for you?

Steve is having his bachelor party this weekend. Don't worry though, I'm not going, as there will be strippers there and I know how you don't want me to be around things like that. Don't worry, it's okay, he'll understand. Yeah, we've been friends since elementary school, but he knows how important our relationship is and that I would never disrespect you like that!

You are the most beautiful woman on the face of the earth!

How can we make our relationship better?

Can you please kiss me?

I'm sorry....

Do you need help with that?

Yes, it's my fault...again. I'm sorry.

Would you like me to....

Hey....I said I'm sorry!

Please don't hang up on me....hello? HELLO?!?!?

Oh the painful recollections of my former self and how I lived a life walking on eggshells and fearful dishonesty. Re-reading that again makes me want to retch. It makes me want to travel back in time and kick my bitch-ass self in the balls. Except even that wouldn't be possible, as my balls were safely hidden away in her purse.

I was just trying to be the Nice Guy. The archetype of the supposed type of guy women say they want.

Trying to do and be all the things a man is supposed to, to make the relationship work. Being sensitive to her needs. Striving to please her, and make sure to avoid upsetting her as much as possible.

Checking with her on everything.

Constantly asking for reassurance that she was happy. Constantly asking for her approval.

Making sure I was trying not to do anything that would upset her. This included telling a lot of "white" lies to try and avoid upsetting her. Striving to be supportive.

To let her needs, wants and desires supersede my own at every potential conflict.

This is precisely how guys slide into attraction killing "Beta-tude."

I was trying to live the deliberately programmed lie enlightened ideal of EQUALITY by avoiding any overt expressions or actions of confident masculinity. The last thing I ever wanted to be accused of, was being a "misogynist."

This is also how I almost ended up divorced. Thanks to the great unlearning gleaned from the insights of Game, I am today a Father, a Husband, and the unquestioned leader and head of MY household.

And the one overriding, most important principle I came to in my study of Game, was that the unapologetic, unashamed embrace of masculinity is found through honesty....honor and truth as venerated throughout history in all of the Great Books for Men. **lozlzolzol**

Game gave me the means to step outside of myself and see just how dishonest I was being in striving to be NICE. It allowed me to recognize how I was learned by society at large to become a bitch, and gave me the starting point to unlearn all those attitudes and behaviors, so that I could relearn the authentic meaning of masculinity. As noted in my past post, The Priamary Trait of the AMC: Fearful Dishonesty:

When I was an Average Married Chump, I was a liar. A dishonest weasel. I lied all the time. Most all of it was so-called "white lies." And it wasn't just in relation to my wife, but with my peer group, my work-place colleagues and school classmates...everyone.

This was because I lived my life afraid to upset other people. I tried to always find what I mistakenly thought of as the path of least resistance. To use dishonesty to avoid conflict. For instance, if I were invited to participate in something I did not care to, I would scramble for a convenient excuse -- A LIE -- instead of being honest and straightforward and saying, "no thanks, I'm not interested in doing that."

The real problem with that is when you spin webs of deceit, you eventually get tangled up and caught. It is inevitable if your whole social life is based on trying to avoid upsetting people by lying to them. And from the perspective of the woman you are having a relationship with, it is the ultimate respect-killer.

This is how "game" showed me truth, and eventually brought me to Truth. Women's attraction and respect are based on hypergamy. Being a bitch of a NICE GUY puts you into the role of supplicant, the beta-orbiter and puppy dog douche, pussy whipped and stumbling around in a oneitis-induced stupor of idiocy. This leads to contempt and the unhaaaapppppiness of your spouse. Keep it up long enough, and you end up caught and ground up in the wheels of injustice in our anti-family court systems.

Reverse-engineering this sad state of affairs was only made possible by discovering this thing called game.

I know what I know, because it was knowledge and experience gained through personal trials and tribulations, brought about by much introspection and unlearning all of the regularly scheduled programming of relationship dysfunction in our Brave New World Order.

When I contemplate the topic of Game, I am not distracted nor side-tracked by the moral and spiritual judgement of its foremost practitioners who indulge in hedonistic and nihilistic debauchery. That is where you can go with it, but that does not define it in it's sum totality.

Based on my personal experience, I am firmly persuaded that I knows already, without a shadow of doubt, what is laid before me.